The Next Right Thing

How I stopped trying to carry everything and started focusing on one task at a time.

The harpsichord alarm chimed from my phone, pulling me awake from the night’s sleep. Unlike recently, when I had been hitting snooze and drifting back to sleep, I had to get up — recent changes at work made that apparent. The days of easing into the morning that I adopted in mid-January were gone.

I got up…I had to get up, my inner drill sergeant informed me.

Staring at my reflection in the mirror while I brushed my teeth, I felt my shoulders tense. I was frustrated — irritated that I had to whip myself back into early-wake-up shape and annoyed that mounting responsibilities suddenly demanded more from me again.

The sudden influx of more to do pressed against my mind all at once. Tasks clambered at the back of my brain like a dog desperate to get out the door. I didn’t yet have a full grasp on all of them, but I knew they were important, likely difficult, and many.

Just the thought of them made me grouchy.

And that’s when I remembered…wait a minute — who is in charge here? And what do they expect of me?

I am one person. Literally just one person.

Yes, a very capable person, but still, just a single person.

Can you relate — trying to keep up with the imaginary superhuman your mind has created to tackle the collective responsibilities on your plate?

I found myself pondering that word recently — responsibility. At its root, it’s the ability to respond. Maybe responsibility isn’t about carrying everything. Maybe it’s simply about choosing how we respond to what’s in front of us.

Because we are always responding, aren’t we? The real choice lies in how we do it. And that choice makes all the difference in the world, especially to the person living inside your own head, which I could argue is the most important person in the room.

This drill sergeant of mine likes to take over in the face of big challenges. And I admit, they’ve been very effective.

And yet, I’m learning there is another voice available to me. One that is quieter, steadier, and far more powerful.

When I shoulder everything, as my drill sergeant insists I should, I dive into action-action-action. When I’m in action, I can’t ask for help or look at the resources around me because explaining things slows me down and there are important things to accomplish!

But when I pause the drill sergeant’s narrative, someone calmer and clearer comes to the surface. I stop trying to carry everything at once and accept that I am one single person who cannot manage it all alone.

Then, I can focus on the next right task.

Sometimes that task includes asking for help. Sometimes it includes resting. Sometimes it includes taking action. But when I focus only on the next right thing, whether done alone or with the help of my village, I’m often surprised by the immense strides accomplished by the end of the day.

You don’t have to do everything, Ashley. You only have to do the next right thing. I heard my inner voice say while brushing my teeth.

And at that moment, my day changed.

It became brighter and more manageable. Dare I say I even had fun? There was suddenly less to do because I only had one thing to do — the next right thing.

People ask how it was for me to run across America. They think about the entire thing and can’t imagine taking on such a challenge.

But I never ran across America all at once.

On day one, I wasn’t thinking about New York. I was thinking about running across the Golden Gate Bridge with friends breathing in the fresh ocean air.

That was manageable.

And the next day, I did the next mile. And then the next one after that.

When my inner drill sergeant takes over, it demands that I stare at all the miles collectively because look how many there are!

But when I pause and remember that I am one person — calm, clear, confident — I run one mile at a time.

I clicked the cap back onto my toothpaste and tucked the tube into the drawer. I turned the water warm and washed the sleep from my face. I pulled on my clothes and prepared to head to the gym.

And the day unfolded, as it always does, with or without added pressure, one task at a time.

And I did not feel overwhelmed.

I felt accomplished.

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